Memory Lane: Shelley Barker

I started dating Shelley shortly before I turned nineteen. I was still living at home, in Marysville, CA. (gods what a horrible place to grow up) and going to Junior College there. Shelley was a junior in highschool (Lindhurst High School, to be exact).

My friend Marc and I were walking the campus one day when she saw him and called his name--he called her over and introduced us (he knew her from high school, despite their difference in age). We exchanged numbers, spoke for hours that night and quickly became a couple.

Almost as quickly as we began dating (the second date), we began having sex (very very shortly thereafter, I moved into my own place, with roommates), but because she fancied herself a devout Mormon, vaginal sex was wholly off-limits (and so it remained for us for a year and a half). Oral and manual were ok, though my receiving either was rare. Most definitely, the action was all in the ass.

One hundred percent of the times we got to be alone together, we got nasty and she was a big anal pig. It got to be where she would come over before going to school for it, then come over during lunch for it and then again after school. She'd lie to her parents about her work schedule in order to come over and get more anal loving.

Shelley always came from anal sex. She was ravenous for it and she liked it hard and she was not afraid to tell you so. She took enjoyment from walking funny afterwards. She thrilled at the difficulty in travelling my apartment's stairs afterwards.

And we did it everywhere. We did it at home. We did it in the walk-in freezer at our then mutual work. We did it in the movie theatre. We did it in her house. We did it at four in the afternoon on the lawn of her unfenced front yard. We did it while trespassing on some unknown farmer's pasture--and he drove by us on his tractor mid-coitus. We did it in church and in my mother's car. We did it in my roommate's bed.

For two years, I was the ass master and she was my devoted disciple. When we finally moved on to vaginal sex, it didn't feel right. It was too vanilla, and our relationship, especially the sex, was much more chocolatey.

Of course, what I'm not delving into here, and what I should, is a deep and intense description of her many psychoses. This was a girl (and probably still is) with massive jealousy and possession issues, massive daddy issues, massive guilt issues over her religious hypocrisy; paranoia, violence real and threatened; stalking; infidelity...

So much was wrong with her, and was wrong with me from so much exposure to her, that I eventually had to move eight hundred miles away, without notice and in less than a week, in order to separate myself from her and regain my own sense of self and freedom.

That Summer didn't end the story of that psycho Mormon, Shelley Barker, though it did end her hold over me, we still got together on occasion for some nasty anal rough-and-tumble.

Last I heard, she was called back to the mothership in Utah, had gotten knocked up (the poor fuck; better he than me) and was getting married. To this day, I fear she'll show up at my door, kill my wife and try to reinsert herself back into my life.

This is why I shy away from dating other Mormons. The ones following her (and there've been a couple) were never as psycho as she got (though not a single one was very pure and righteous), but I never stuck around long enough to let them get that way.