Clerks II

First:

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday, dear Denise,
Happy Birthday to you!

I love you, dear.

Now:
Work has been its typical level of pain-in-the-butt, from even more instances of customer oddities, to new menu items that taste like vomit to Friday when our owner-operator decided to hang out, in the way, through our lunch rush, yelling and screaming at people, calling them names, and so forth because the store wasn't running perfectly (and this was a shift where three personnel didn't show up as well). That last was especially fun.

New car had some massive transmission leaks, and proved to be quickly and inexpensively fixed--woot!

I've just finished outlining my next writing project; now to turn it into a detailed synopsis and pitch. Wish me some efficiency and expediency, folks!

50 Book Challenge #8: Duma Key by Stephen King. Really? Only eight? I am seriously slacking as a reader. Too many (read: one) extra-pleasant distractions plus some mind drudgery (aka Facebook Superheroes application) and a nice up-tick in writing have had me beglecting my books. As for this novel in particular--it was a very slow start (took me weeks to get through first quarter, a couple days for last three quarters), and was very typical post- Needful Things King (which means less spectacular to me primarily due to being less concise, seemingly under-edited for length). I liked the conceit of ghost limbs having magical powers, and the demonic trinket from the sea was both interesting and in its own way un-scary. I think that last sums it best: I miss scary King and wonder what ate him?

Anyhoo, off to phase two of writing project.

Mortal Kombat

Clerks

So Juno comes out on dvd tomorrow. That's a good thing. Its soundtrack is already on heavy rotation here on my laptop.

Work pretty much sucks, more so even than usual. I have new categories of annoying customers to share: The Smarmy Bastard and (subcategory to The Unkempt) The Unattractively Hairy. Your typical Smarmy Bastard has the intonation of the asswipe preppy country club jerk from 80s era teen coming-of-age movies and does things like give you exactly $6 on a $6 order and tell you to keep the change. I've had a lot of those this week. As for the Unattractively Hairy, I have but one example, but it's a doozy (one that goes beyond arm-hair sweaters poking out of t-shirts). Imagine a pretty, shapely, twenty something girl. Nice halter top, well-fit hip hugging jeans and a thatch of untrimmed hedge 1" x 5" (or so) stretching out past the expanse of her pants' waistline. Shudder.

I'm getting completely screwed over by the shift scheduler the past two weeks as well. Last week I was scheduled with night shifts that fell such that I didn't get to even see Lash or Aeia from Wednesday through Friday night. This week I have night shifts five nights in a row, and won't be able to see Lash or Aeia from Tuesday more than a half hour or so all the way through Saturday morning. It's absolute bullshit. And the closing shifts leave me too tired in the morning to get up, be on my best and find something new.

I want to strangle pretty much the majority of Burgerland this week, I'm just very very frustrated.

Grew tired enough of the Mustang never working that we finally got rid of it this weekend. Got a whole 85 bucks for it at the junkyard. Which is actually probably more than the piece of crap was worth. But this leaves us in another screwed for transportation situation while I wait for the IRS to decide how much of our return I get this year and how much gets retained for student loan back payments. Ugh.

I got Guitar Hero 3 a couple weeks back. I like it, but prefer #2, which has, in my opinion, a superior song list. I really want to get my hands on Rock Band. Crossing fingers that it's what Denise is planning for me in June.

What else? I've been writing some poetry. Good times. I'm trying to get some other writing ideas worked out. My friend John wans me to help him with a screenplay, but between full time work, tending the kids when Denise is working, and my current writing output in progress alone and in collaboration with Cammie I just can't give him the time a full length screenplay would need. I feel bad telling him no though, so if he does get a first draft out, I'll probably offer to go through it and polish it some.

Gross. I have calluses on my feet from work.

Major League

Today was Lash's first real baseball game. He did all right. Playing right field he was only part of one play during fielding, but he did that play well enough. He had two times at bat: the first time he struck out, the second time he was walked, and eventually scored a run. He had a good deal of fun. I had a good deal of crying baby so had to watch from the car where things are far less exciting.

In case you missed it, didn't read the labels for the last post, whatever, it was my poor attempt at being subtle in my April Fool's prankery. The previous post, saying it wasn't an April Fool's post, was an April Fool's post. I only feel the need to point this out further because some people have let me know they've taken it a bit too seriously.

I'm in a great mood for cookies and have none. Grrr.

I've been feeling on the cusp of writing a new poem or some new poems. Something seems to be blocking my ignition, but they're there, pushing, percolating, pulsing, waiting to be freed.

In that vein, April being National Poetry Month, here's one of my favourites, one that's been on my mind lately, by e.e.cummings:

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
                                  i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

April Fool's Day

I've been wiling the morning away trying to think of suitable ways to celebrate todays holiday and prank the pants off people in real life and here in blogland. I've come to the conclusion that I've plain lost all my creativity--at least in this regard.

When I re-read the pranks Cammie pulled on her fiancee on his Myspace blog, or the subtle and fantastic pranks from Google today, I just feel cowed. How to compete? I mean, I don't even know how to make the little accent mark appear on the word fiancee so that Microsoft Word doesn't annoy me with its little red squiggly.

All of this is to say that while I could write a post that reveals I'm really an 80 year old woman, or going to prison for selling Milli Vanilli bootlegs, or from the planet Kotex, I think you're all much too savvy to be fooled by something so blatantly false and over-the-top.

And given my current life of absolute drudgery where I gaze from work at my only view--the cemetery across the street--and think of how much prettier a place it would be for me to stay than where I am; where I struggle against thoughts of leaving Denise for someone else every day, and he wouldn't reciprocate those feelings so boy would that be foolish; where the only thing I look forward to is the live action G.I.Joe movie (I mean how awesome is it that Ray Park gets to play another movie role where he's bound to do lots of martial art ass kicking and not be allowed to speak or show his face?) and the day long head rush of my expired antidepressant meds.

Given this, real life just kills the fun of thought-processing April Fool's punkery.

So here, instead, an educational video:

http://www.5min.com/Video/Get-change-out-of-vending-machine-3454