The church's stalking machine has upped the ante with me. In addition to the annual birthday and Christmas cards, and the twice-yearly surprise visits from the missionaries to see if I need anything, and the hilarious attempt to get a member to try and penpal me into a date, today in the mail I had solicitation from the church asking me to donate money to the Boy Scouts of America because it is so desperately in need of more moral monetary backing.

Puke.