I'm going to try and force myself back into a writing routine. It starts with, no matter how mundane or simple, a commitment to write something new here every day. Some days it'll be a meme, some days a rant against the man or work or etc., some days posts of great meaning or esoterica, etc. but something. I can't let displeasure with my current lot in life continue to cripple my writing output, and so the rebound starts here. My request to you, faithful readers and friends: if a full day passes without me posting something new, post a comment to my most recent post demanding I get off my ass and post again.
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Saturday was my grandmother's memorial service. I drove up with my sister Autumn and brought Lash & Aeia along. It was really good to share the trip with Autumn and felt like we connected well and was thankful we got to catch up as much as we did.
I had a lot of trepidation about this trip initially. Everyone in my family has a tendency towards melodrama, grudge keeping, making the occasional scene, and I had my fears this would be the case then as well and am thankful that it just wasn't the case this time, that my grandmother's memorial was filled with the respect and love she deserved. One of my aunts did say to me exactly what I'd been thinking for a couple weeks: "All she ever wanted was to bring everyone together again, and she finally did, and it's sad because it won't happen again except for another situation like this." Which is sadly true. We just aren't the best definition of function.
Many of my family members present, especially the successful ones, hadn't been seen since back when I still worked as an English teacher, and every conversation I had where I had to tell one of them that no, I was no longer teaching and that now I worked in the restaurant service industry (and not as a "real" chef or owner of an eatery) left me feeling lower, pitied. It has me bummed out, but at least I'm working, providing as best I can for my family, my children--that's the thought I have to stay focused with.
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1 comment:
You often write some pretty personal stuff here but I'm always reluctant to comment in a personal way. I'm going to this time.
Why don't you teach anymore? Maybe that could be a blog post or maybe there is one already that you can point me too. Knowing you and what you know and where your passions lie, I've often wondered why you don't teach.
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